Attention span? What attention span?
I feel like a hummingbird today. I can’t focus. I can’t keep my mind on one thing. I keep jumping up and down and interrupting myself. I don’t know why. I don’t have anything special going on or anything special I’m looking forward to. I’d eat nectar if I could find it.
Did you know that the reason why nothing in nature that can be eaten is blue is because blue means poison? Well, that, and yellow. But not all yellow, just yellow animals. Okay, and not even all of them because hamsters and canaries are yellow. But frogs! Those yellow ones? They’re poisonous all right. And the blue ones, too. There aren’t any natural foods with the color blue. And don’t be all, oh what about blueberries, Liz? Because you know they are not blue. They’re purple.
Are too.
Are too.
Are TOO.
The reason why I’m on about this is because my colleague and I just went and bought 1200 kronor worth of blue candy. Not natural. They all look toxic and nasty. Sour and licoricey. The chocolates are okay, because they’re just WRAPPED in blue. I made her put a box of white sugar marshmallows in too, because everything looked so poisonous.
Once, when I was fairly young, I insisted on dying the mashed potatoes light blue for Easter dinner. I had some idea that the food should all be pastel because Easter colors are pastel. My mother indulged me, god knows why, and no one would eat my pretty mashed potatoes. There was NO CYANIDE in the potatoes, people! It was just food coloring, I swear! I can’t remember if I even ate them.
Nowadays, blue food is IN, it’s RAD, it’s cool. Blue slurpees, blue popsicles, blue candy, for all I know there’s blue ketchup.
OHMIGOD! There IS blue ketchup! I just googled it and there it was!
I have to go sit down now and put my head between my knees.