Nearly every morning when I drop Martin off at school, a crowd of little blonde girls comes running up to him. The other boys on the playground are playing 4-square or kicking a soccer ball around or wrestling and the girls pretty much totally ignore them. When the girls have birthday parties, Martin is the only boy they invite (besides their brothers). When HE has a birthday party, I have to remind him that at least a couple of boys need to make the invitation list.
Last week when Eva was bringing her two boys to choir and told them that Martin and Karin would be there, her oldest (who is a year older than Martin at the same school) asked if Martin was the one “that laughs all the time.” 🙂
Sometimes I worry that he’s going to get teased or bullied because he prefers to play with the girls and do “girl things,” but at the same time, I’m GLAD that he’s not a “regular” boy. I know that sounds weird. But most of the little boys I know are SO loud and rambunctious and wild and even violent. They play with cars and balls and throw things and fight. I’m sure Anders would be happy if Martin were a little more interested in sports of some kind, ANY kind, but I’m glad that my little boy is creative and sensitive and bright and quiet and funny.
By girl things, I mean he likes to draw and paint and spell and write and read and sing and play with dolls and animals and houses and games. He arranges little bedrooms for his stuffed animals. He collects leaves because they’re pretty. He doesn’t want to watch violent cartoons. He rarely plays with cars and trucks or anything involving a ball. He’s already shown interest in playing chess and other fairly complicated board games. He’s a fiend for complicated computer learning games. His favorite film is A Bug’s Life. He arranges things in conscious order: by size, by type, by color. Once, when he was around 18 months old, he was playing with a set of those large plastic snap-together beads. He had set them out in a pattern on the floor, and I suddenly realized that they were in the order of the color scale of the rainbow.
The other day, a friend of ours commented on how intelligent Martin is, and that he wished he saw the same things in his own son, who is a VERY typical boy child, in the most stereotypical of ways. There is nothing whatsoever wrong with being a typical boy child (or girl child) but I think it’s a shame that in our world, GIRLS who like to play with boy things are encouraged, for the most part, while BOYS who like to play with girl things are discouraged because they’ll be seen as weak or gay or effeminate. When they ought to be seen as creative and interesting and caring and special. I know that’s how most people see my son. He amazes me nearly every day and I’m just his mother. Think if I was a classmate or a friend!
