Tagged: beinglizardek

23
Jun
2008

CLUCK OR CLOCK

Visiting Anthropologie for the first time while in the States in April, this chicken timer was what I couldn’t leave the store without. It has “Instruction Manual” printed on the bottom with 2 illustrated steps which show those clueless about kitchen timers how to turn it past the time you want and back again to start it. The only thing that could make it any better would be if it clucked when it went off. Or if it laid an egg! That would be cool. My mom had been in the store during the day while I was working, and...

15
Jun
2008

THINGS I RARELY, IF EVER, DO ANY MORE

Read a printed paper newspaper Look up the definition of a word in a printed, bound dictionary Write letters on paper, put them in envelopes and mail them in a postbox Get up in the middle of the night because a child is crying Think about old boyfriends Look up phone numbers in a printed, bound telephone directory Sing in the shower Print out photos Write checks Have regrets Vacuum up cat hair Ask for directions Sunbathe Watch movies Wash my children or shampoo their hair Play board or card games that require other people or physical accessories Worry about...

07
Jun
2008

CONFESSION

I’m a bit bored. Maybe it takes longer to unwind than I suspected. I’ve done (pretty much) nothing but lounge around and read like a fiend for 2 whole days but yet this feeling of weird detachment persists. The sun has been shining, with the exception of one downpour day, nonstop for 6 weeks. Have you any idea how unprecedented that is in this part of Sweden? Everyone seems to be gobsmacked with summer delirium, gulping great swallows of the perfect air, knowing it won’t last, feeling like it’s a dream, determined to get every ounce of joy out of...

06
Jun
2008

DOWNTIME

There might have been an invitation to something that was sidestepped. There might have been the idea of getting things done somewhere in the back of your mind. There is, for certain, a list, more likely plural, lying somewhere with patience or, perhaps, resignation. But there is something more, something which overwhelms and smothers all other considerations: 3 free days. No obligations No plans No one else’s needs No commitments …and no desire to do anything but revel in the peace and quiet and the unassailable joy of doing nothing but what you feel like doing, in each moment as...

17
May
2008

OBVIOUS PROBLEMS SITTING STILL

A Saturday with absolutely no plans* has resulted in the following: sleeping in until 9:30 and then dozing for another half hour finishing a book and beginning another 6 loads of clean, sweet-smelling folded laundry, including a million towels and the bedding from every bed in the house 3 clean, sweet-smelling, freshly-made beds 6.5 bags of outgrown children’s clothing a logic problem conquered on the second try Chinese take-away for dinner a quick run to the store for milk a half-vacuumed house myskväll with shrimp crackers, fortune cookies and a new movie to watch (Enchanted) a journal post!…of sorts *for...

17
Apr
2008

THE WOODS WOULD BE VERY SILENT IF NO BIRDS SANG THERE EXCEPT THOSE THAT SANG BEST*

My brother thinks what I do here isn’t Writing (with a capital W). But what he doesn’t realize is that I’m not really a writer and if I wasn’t writing here, I wouldn’t be writing at all. I started this journal SPECIFICALLY to kick start my writing again, and it worked, and as a big fat bonus I also got a round of awesome people to become friends with and the whole Internet to ask questions of and get recognition and applause from. Score! There simply isn’t enough time in the day to do all the things I’d like to...

14
Apr
2008

NOT A GOOD START

I walked around the house in the late evening, turning off lights and checking the locks on the doors. Then I went and brushed my teeth and put on my nightgown and took my book into bed with me. I set the alarm, thinking, “Have to get up at a quarter to 7” in order to get the kids up and dressed and breakfasted, so that we would all be on time for school and work. I read for awhile and then I turned out the light and went to sleep. I slept really hard and when I woke I...

07
Apr
2008

GROWING OLD IS MANDATORY, GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL*

I have, and have had, so much to do that I keep forgetting I’ve done things. I’ve always been proud of my memory but it seems to be failing me more and more lately. Or rather, I suppose it’s I who have overburdened it so badly that it’s staggered and fallen to its knees (beneath my hairline). My memory has fallen and it can’t get up! When do I start worrying about Alzheimers? When does the Part-heimers cross the line? When I can’t remember who I am? Where I’m supposed to be? Which of my children has a birthday in...

01
Apr
2008

CRACK ADDICT

La la la! Hey there! How are ya? Good? Are you good? I’m good, though I was kinda wondering earlier when I felt that familiar sense of detachment settle around my shoulders like a warm and comfortable shawl. I’ve been in the process of shrugging it off all evening, however, and it’s currently lying on the floor, keeping my feet warm instead. I had a massage at work today, much-needed since last week just as I knocked on the door for my scheduled appointment she popped her head out with her coat on and made me want to cry by...

29
Mar
2008

FROGS & TOADS TOGETHER

Rainy days make me feel like I’m sunk inside myself with no way out. Grey is my mood, grey as the sky. Motivation is at an all-time low and though what I really want to do is lie down and nap I refuse to do so because I know that if I do, I will sleep for several hours, right through dinner, in fact, and will waken feeling drugged and sluggish and grumpier than before. Projects tug and tease at the corners of my mind but I keep ignoring them in favor of lethargy and leaning on one elbow playing...