07
Jan
2021

AS THE YEARS GO BY, THEY TAKE THEIR TOLL ON YOU*

It’s been snowing all day, that thin corn snow that doesn’t stick. I didn’t actually check the temperature but it had to have been right at freezing, because even though it was cold enough to snow, it all just melted as soon as it touched down. Now, however, in the early evening, it’s STILL snowing and now, finally, there is a thin blanket of white. We’ve only had one other night of snow (maybe two? I can’t remember) but it’s always been gone by midday the day after. I hope it will stick around a little and brighten things up. Even though we’ve passed the solstice it’s still SO DARK all the time.

For the first time ever, I spent some time just now unfriending people on Facebook. I had over 700 “friends” and honestly, I have no idea why. Some of them are people I went to school with, others are people I used to work with long ago, or who were members of the AWC but have since moved away, or people who were in a choir with me, two choirs ago, that I have no actual contact with. I figure if they really want to be friends with me, they can contact me again and I’ll be happy to add them back, but I don’t think they’ll notice or miss me. We weren’t interacting anyway, and some of them had offensive Trump-supporting bullshit on their pages, which I am just not in the mood to condone. Even family members.

I’m tired and headachy, and stuffy, and hoping I am not coming down with something, though I don’t know how I could be since I haven’t been out of my house hardly at all for the past month unless Karin gave me something. I was up too late last night, watching the awfulness in the US capitol and wondering why all the Republicans who FINALLY said enough don’t understand why we are so disgusted with them. Too little, too late. Even if they remove Trump from office NOW, 13 days before he will be out anyway, they have done nothing for too long, which aided and abetted him and his cronies for FOUR years.

Tomorrow is my last day of vacation, and then the weekend, and then back to “regular” routines, which just means back to work full-time, but still from home. We are working from home until January 15, but I expect it will be extended again. I’d be surprised if they started the rotation schedule back up right now, when the pandemic is still raging and numbers are still rising. I called Anders’ mom today and she is doing okay. Still very tired and lonely and sad, none of which we can help with. 🙁

This weekend I plan on taking down Christmas, which is also a sad activity, and a long one. I won’t have any help either since Anders will be gone, helping a friend with something, and Karin doesn’t live here anymore. But it will keep me occupied, at least! The difference between my summer vacation and this vacation is quite wide if you think about all the things I got done then and all the nothing I did now. I know vacations are supposed to be about relaxing and recharging, but mostly all this past month has been doing is making me want to sleep more. And I don’t sleep in the way I used to, so it’s been a bust as far as sleeping goes, too.

I need sunshine and cheerfulness. Usch då!

*from See a Little Light by Bob Mould

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