21
Oct
2017

IN MY HEAD, IN MY HEART

Every day as I drive to and from work, or to and from the grocery store in the next village over, I take snapshots in my mind. I even caption them, thinking as I do, that I should take the time to stop the car and take and shoot an actual photo, even if just with my phone.

The little abandoned building in Östra Ödarslöv, with peeling paint and pale turquoise doors.

The huge autumn-yellow tree with a bare crown and a ring of leaves around his foot (“Balding”)

The road through Flyingeby, lined with trees, and the huge yellow brick stables at the end.

The field full of storks. The field full of sheep. The field full of seagulls.

The mist and the early morning sun coming up over the rise of the hill toward Lund.

Haybales. Windmills. The curve of the road past the half-timbered house with the many-paned windows.

A burst of bright red maple leaves peeking over a fence.

A hawk perched on a pole, lifting his wings, then rising.

I’ve had no luck yet finding spaghetti squash at the ICA. I was really hoping they’d be coming in now, since they have already been stocking pumpkins and butternut squash. I’m under orders to lose as much weight as possible before my surgery, and the doctor actually told me to do a protein power diet for 2 weeks. URGH. Feel like this week could be titled “Eating minimally” although yesterday I ended up having both lunch and dinner out (was still restrained though). When I got up today, after sleeping in, and then lying in bed reading for an hour, I wasn’t hungry. I took a shower, dressed, put laundry in, and went to the pharmacy and grocery store for salad fixings and fruit. I bought a box of mixed protein powder meals and 2 smoothies from the same brand, and when I got home I STILL wasn’t hungry even though it was after 1, so I read for awhile, and then took a nap. I’ve had one of the smoothies and it’s 4:30 and I’m only now starting to feel a little…peckish. Salad or WW soup for dinner, since it’s chilly and I feel the need for something warm. I didn’t even buy anything for myskväll. GAH. FML.

Next week I have to go have blood drawn for tests and have an EKG done, and hopefully will get the notice in the mail with the actual surgery date, which should be week 48 or 49. I told the doctor if he wanted me to lose a lot of weight, he’d have to give me some time and not schedule the surgery too soon.

I’ve been in a bit of a depressed state this whole week, I think. Worrying about surgery, obsessing about weight and eating habits, and other issues, to boot. And to top it off, the treadmill has suddenly stopped working. Something is wrong with the motor, it drags and if you try to walk faster, it suddenly jerks to a stop and flashes an error message. Anders took a look and tried to figure out what was wrong, and oiled all the machinery, but it’s still not working. *suck* I need a hug. I need several hugs.

Our long weekend trip to Stockholm is pretty well planned now, with a room booked at the Långholmen Prison (former prison, but still!). We stayed there once before when the kids where younger. One side is not renovated and still resembles the old prison and the rooms are barebones cells with metal bunkbeds. The other side has beautiful, much more luxurious rooms with built-in showers and all the amenities. We booked the nice side 🙂 We plan to visit the ABBA Museum, Fotografiska and Hallwylska Museum, none of which we have ever been to before. It looks set to be a nice little get-away.

I had dinner last night with Debbie and Camilla and we made plans to go to the theater in Copenhagen in November to see A Patriot’s Guide to America which struck us all as interesting, even though Debbie is Canadian and Camilla is Swedish 🙂 We go to see plays and shows often, but it’s been awhile since our last outing and we haven’t made it over to Copenhagen for a long time, since it’s been such a pain the past couple of years to get back over the bridge to Sweden, due to the lines and waiting times for border checks.

Is it too terribly awful to take another nap? It’s been grey and gloomy and dark all day and I’m just in the mood to curl up with a blanket and my book and hibernate.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *