I shaved the car windows this morning. It looked like ice but it came off in tissue-paper-thin white curled strips just like the skin from a really bad sunburn when it starts peeling. I only got to do 8 windows and then it was gone, and time to drive to work. Sunburn-skin is gross, but you just can’t stop yourself. You try to pull off the largest possible piece and you can see the pattern of your skin and the tiny tiny pinprick holes where the hairs poked through.
Every grey february tree had a solitary black bird perched at the top. They graduated in size: crow, raven, rook. They were silent, posed, winter birds. The sky was light, blueing and white, clouds sat ring-around-the-collar on the horizon.
WTF: A TV Hate List
- Checked the schedule yesterday to make sure what time the ice skating gala exhibition started (7:00 on Eurosport) only to find CURLING on when I sat down and flipped the TV on at the designated time, to the designated channel
- Rapidly checked the other 2 channels covering the Olympics to find only talking heads and skiing
- Watched curling for over 35 minutes (Canada was kicking Finland’s brush-wielding butt), growing madder and madder, and flipping more and more frantically back and forth
- Stomped into the computer room to see if the gala had been pre-empted. Not only was it moved to Channel 2 with no explanation, it had started at 7:30
- Felt blood pressure recede a bit, watched several ice skaters perform. Wondered why all the women are suddenly pussies who can’t jump outside of competition.
- Aggravation returned as broadcast was interrupted IN THE MIDDLE OF A PERFORMANCE to move from Channel 2 to Channel 1
- Watched a few more skaters. Made fun of costumes. Felt marginally better.
- Gala reached halfway mark and the ice was cleared for zamboni-ing. Cut to commercial. Return to talking heads talking. And talking. And talking and talking. WTF?! It doesn’t take THAT long to zamboni an ice rink. Flip through channels again to discover that gala has resumed apparently 10 minutes ago on Eurosport. No explanation given. Steam leaks from ears.
- Watch more performances, relaxing fractionally despite the fact that my daughter has apparently been replaced by a demented monkey who cannot SIT STILL. Explain to her for the umpteenth time that she makes a better door than window. Threaten her with bodily harm if she doesn’t get out of the way and settle down. Ignore subsequent pouting to watch silver medalists skate.
- Feel the zen-like peace of watching figure-skating finally descend as the first gold medalists perform. Make fun of their stupid costumes. Feel much better. Boggle in disbelief at the end of the performance as commentators nonchalantly say, “well, we’ll see you tomorrow!” and the broadcast fades to talking heads again. WHAT THE FUCK? They had THREE gold medalists left! They split the gala in 2 parts to show THREE performances on Saturday morning?
- Give up in boiling disgust. Angrily approach computer to
ventblog it out even though having an angry post after 3 days of silence is not especially how I wanted things to go this evening. - grump
Cracking Me Up: I’m Just Being Nice Is All, Can’t I Be Nice?
So Cool! And Now I’m Hungry: Perspectives 1 and Perspectives 2 (thanks for the link reebert!)