Tagged: puttingwordstogether

27
Aug
2006

PAGING STUART SMALLEY

When did I stop thinking that what I had to say was worthy of writing down? Somewhere along the line I veered off into feeling that if what I was writing about wasn’t scinctillating, profound or humorous, it wasn’t worth posting. This makes it harder and harder to want to post anything, to write ANYTHING, for fear it isn’t good enough. For who? For me or for my audience? The idea that writing about the mundanities of my day, the things that happen to me, the funny things my kids say, all those little things—isn’t good enough or exciting enough...

25
Jul
2006

BEAUTY CAPTURES YOUR ATTENTION, PERSONALITY CAPTURES YOUR HEART

I sat across from you at the table this evening and all I could think was, you are so beautiful. How can you not see it? How can you be so sure that you’re unattractive? Someone’s got a lot to answer for, that raised you believing a lie. Now I’m not speaking just to you, I’m talking to myself and to the spaces inbetween, where the fine-webbed cracks appear on the inside of the surfaces. Do we all only see our flaws? Are we raised on denial, comparison and self-blindness? What do you see in the looking glass? Who? The...

19
May
2006

BY CHANCE MET, BY CHOICE FRIENDS

My friend Marilyn over at California Fever, wrote a very insightful post today about why people blog, how blogging affects the people who do it, and how the blogosphere has changed in the past few years, both for the better and for the worse. I found myself nodding along with her assessments, for the most part. There seems to be a lot of reflection going on out there among my virtual friends these days and many of us have experienced the cyclical ups and downs of online writing, online journaling, online blogging, or whatever the hell you want to call...

15
May
2006

IN OUR EMBERS IS SOMETHING THAT DOTH LIVE

A child’s toothbrush, a pair of sunglasses snatched off the hall table, and the pajamas they were wearing. That’s what our neighbors saved from their burning house. I think of all their history, their shared memories, the scrapbooks, the photo albums, their daughter’s crayoned scribbles melted to the charred husk of the refrigerator. It’s all just stuff, isn’t it? But it’s YOUR stuff. If it went up in flame and ashes, do you think you would feel freed? That you were winnowed and lightweight and had a free hand to start over; a clean slate? Or would you perpetually be...

19
Apr
2006

WHAT I WOULDN’T GIVE

for her fierce hugs, for her animated faces, for her bouncing, never-stop boisterousness for his twinkle, for the chance to make his dimple appear like a blinking star in the velvet expanse of his cheek, for his concentration and creativity for his hands on me, his arms around me, his careful, thoughtful ways that fill up my days and make my home a haven for her quiet smile, and her wise words, for her harmony: a subtle soprano to my supporting alto, and the chance to let our lifelong friendship blossom into maturity through closer contact for a warm, furry...

16
Mar
2006

PUTTING WORDS TOGETHER WELL

The lovely Squeetleynn* over at Sprigs (which my fingers insisted on typing as ‘spring’ 3x) has been inspiring me and her readers with some wondrous word-art of the loveliest kind: poetry. She didn’t know I have a passion for it, which makes me think that particular love of mine hasn’t come through very clearly here in my journal. What kind of poetry you like is so personal, or to put it another way, one person’s poetry is another man’s poison. I think perhaps it’s a little bit like sharing song lyrics. Even though YOU can hear the song in your...

28
Feb
2006

PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN

Yesterday, a once-upon-a-time-good-friend cancelled a dinner date with me for the second time in 2 months. This is not the same person that upset me with the cancelling just a little while ago, but it is one more in the series of events that have added to the soul-searching, and self-evaluation I seem to be in the middle of. I don’t have the time or energy to continue making the effort any more with that particular person. If she tries to reschedule again, I think I will just say no. And if she asks me why, I will try very...

04
Feb
2006

ALL HANDS ON DECK

Sometimes I feel like my life is like the water in the ocean. Waves lap at the shore and retreat with the tides, a palette of colors and motion that stays basically the same, unchanging from day to day. But once in a while a storm blows in, and suddenly the breakers are huge and scary and the dash of spray against the cliffs is drenching everything, and things break up and float away, and it’s hard to see where the lines in the sand once were, and if I’m not careful, the undertow will grab me and pull me...

02
Feb
2006

FOR SOMEONE WITH NOTHING TO SAY I SURE TALK A LOT

I honestly feel I have nothing to say. Which is weird, because I just talked on the phone to a total stranger for nearly half an hour. And weird, because anyone who knows me would say that my not having anything to say is a thing of beauty and a joy forever unusual. *sings softly* Hey ho, anybody listening? Hey ho, anybody here? Hey ho, anybody listening? ……….Anybody caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare? Heh. That was the part of the refrain from a gospel song I sang in Messengers when I was 17. So, what the hell is the matter with me? General malaise...

17
Jan
2006

ROSES IN DECEMBER

All my life I’ve tried to train my brain to take snapshots. When I’m in a moment that I find particularly moving or beautiful or funny, I sometimes hear this tiny little director behind my eyes suddenly whip out his megaphone, adjust his beret and yell PLACES EVERYONE—FREEZE FRAME! “SSSSSHHHH,” I tell him, “You’re ruining the moment. Be quiet.” And he frowns and looks indignant and mumbles something about just doing his job. I don’t remember when I became conscious of doing this: consciously trying to save a memory. Perhaps around the age of 9 or 10, the same time...