I walked around the house in the late evening, turning off lights and checking the locks on the doors. Then I went and brushed my teeth and put on my nightgown and took my book into bed with me. I set the alarm, thinking, “Have to get up at a quarter to 7” in order to get the kids up and dressed and breakfasted, so that we would all be on time for school and work. I read for awhile and then I turned out the light and went to sleep. I slept really hard and when I woke I...
Eating blueberry cake hot out of the oven Sitting on a sun-warmed bench at a playground with my face turned up to the light and the heat Watching Martin patiently play with a little 4-year-old girl who had attached herself like a limpet, and marveling over how GROWN-UP he suddenly looked Rocking out to great old 90s tunes in the car Listening to blackbirds sing Getting a backrub by shoulderblade from my daughter (very weird, though) Seeing a stork stalk gawkily along the edge of a field Walking outside in the clear cold night air, where the paving stones sparkle...
How much do you think your friends define you? Are you cool because of the people you hang out with or are they cool because of YOU? What I love most about book group is not actually the books we read. Most of the books are not books I would have chosen to read at all, and while sometimes that’s okay and they turn out to be worth it; that’s not always the case. It’s not the discussions about the books either, though I like those a lot, especially when there are majorly mixed feelings about the book or in...
I have, and have had, so much to do that I keep forgetting I’ve done things. I’ve always been proud of my memory but it seems to be failing me more and more lately. Or rather, I suppose it’s I who have overburdened it so badly that it’s staggered and fallen to its knees (beneath my hairline). My memory has fallen and it can’t get up! When do I start worrying about Alzheimers? When does the Part-heimers cross the line? When I can’t remember who I am? Where I’m supposed to be? Which of my children has a birthday in...
Oh my god, I am so sad. I just heard the horrible news that our good friends had to put their dog, Chimay, to sleep last weekend, after he suffered a slipped disk in his spine. He was the most wonderful sweetheart of a dog. We had the signal honor of having Chimay at our house for a week about a year and a half ago and have greeted him with proprietary affection every time we’ve seen him since. This sure put a damper on the good mood post below. I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes wondering how...
What determines your mood? Is it already preset when you wake up? Does the sunshine factor in? Is it based on how many things you have to do during the day or worries you have about the week ahead? Despite the cloud cover, we have had intermittent sunshine all day. Right now it is beaming through the house like a great big global smile. It’s lighting up everything—the floor, the fish tank, the dirty windows. I still have to get out and go for a walk, but am guessing I will end up going after dinner which I need to...
The lungwort in the front garden is in full bloom. What an ugly name for a pretty plant. It was fun just now to look up the origin of the name, however I like the other colloquial names for it much better: Spotted dog, Jerusalem cowslip, Soldiers & Sailors. I like it because it has such fun polka-dotted leaves and it flowers for a really long time, and then it flowers again, and also it just keeps coming up year after year without my having to do anything much. I like low-maintenance plants, since I’m the world’s most indifferent gardener....
La la la! Hey there! How are ya? Good? Are you good? I’m good, though I was kinda wondering earlier when I felt that familiar sense of detachment settle around my shoulders like a warm and comfortable shawl. I’ve been in the process of shrugging it off all evening, however, and it’s currently lying on the floor, keeping my feet warm instead. I had a massage at work today, much-needed since last week just as I knocked on the door for my scheduled appointment she popped her head out with her coat on and made me want to cry by...
Rainy days make me feel like I’m sunk inside myself with no way out. Grey is my mood, grey as the sky. Motivation is at an all-time low and though what I really want to do is lie down and nap I refuse to do so because I know that if I do, I will sleep for several hours, right through dinner, in fact, and will waken feeling drugged and sluggish and grumpier than before. Projects tug and tease at the corners of my mind but I keep ignoring them in favor of lethargy and leaning on one elbow playing...
Urgh